Welcome to the first day of New Fleshbot — which, for the curious, should be remarkably similar to Old Fleshbot. Our Founding Editor John D. may have set off in search of less porny pastures, leaving me at the helm of the good ship Fleshbot, but we'll still be bringing you your daily dose of dirtpipe milkshakes, freshly rimmed gapes, and all the porn that's fit to print. Over the coming weeks, you may notice a few changes as we tidy things ...

Monica kisses her man goodbye. A loving wife, right? She watches him leave for work and then calls for a delivery of fuck. What a fucking bitch. Did he deserve that? Maybe he did. The minute the delivery boy shows, she grabs him by the pipe. The horny bastard carries her to the couch, eats her out, then fucks her until he's about to cum. Monica sucks his rod until he spurts. She licks his cum off her fingers like a good whoring wife. ...

Now that all the airlines are looking to add in-flight internet service, the biggest question on everyone's mind is, of course, who is going to be responsible for telling the guy in 18-B to turn down the volume on "Cum Fart Tsumani". Although it could give a whole new meaning to the concept of a "red eye" flight. (foxnews.com)

You kids today, you think you invented everything. The rusty trombones! The dirt pipe smoothies and the ass milkshakes, or whatever you're drinking in those hipster cocktail lounges these days! And what about hot girl-on-girl catfights? You think that no one ever filmed a crisp slap to the cheek or some down-and-dirty apartment wrestling before those newfangled camcorder thingamajiggies came along? Well, YouTube user girlfitewiz is here to set yo...

You may remember a couple of months back when an indicted pornographer wanted to use the "Google Defense" to prove his innocence in a obscentiy trial. As a legal question, obscenity is usually defined as some sort of violation of acceptable "community standards." But how do you know what your community finds acceptable? Ask Google, of course! If people in your community enjoy searching for and reading about "butt sex," then the back door must be ...

Observant porn surfers may have noticed a little RTA graphic that has been appearing on the landing page of many adult websites over the past several months—including this one. If you haven't figured it out already, it stands for "Restricted to Adults" and it's part of a seld-policing Porn Valley-backed campaign to help keep kids from looking at material they're not supposed to. The program has already attracted the support of stars like St...

So yeah, that article in the New York Times today about hot Olympic bodies? In addition to all the eye candy, it turns out it's the first time the Grey Lady has printed the word "XTube" as well (and no, that online mention in a Freakonomics column a few months ago doesn't count). We're still waiting for them to use the terms "bulgewatch", "ass smoothie", and "dirt pipe milkshake" ... but for now we'll take what we can get. Baby steps, y'all! (eri...

During a pivotal scene in the classic sci-fi mystery "They Live", wrestling superhero Rowdy Roddy Piper explains that he has come to chew bubble gum and kick ass—and that he is fresh out of bubble gum. We were reminded of this while watching the latest installment of director Will Ryder's "Bubble Gum Cuties" for Bad Seed, although the resemblance in this case depends on swapping out a letter or two in Piper's proclamation. Volume 4 of the p...

In this scene from the "you're the man" point-of-view XL Girls DVD Plush Control, newcomer Hayden encounters the hard man and and proceeds to fuck and suck him dry. This is a new Hayden, a Florida babe, not the Hayden from California who began posing in 2004. Hayden worships the pork-pipe with her mouth and huge tits, and the POV camera adds to the jackin' power of these photos. "Hayden has a talented mouth," said Mr. Cock. "She would...

Her mother may have wielded some serious weapons in her day, but Lydia Hearst-Shaw has her own way of sending her greetings to the people: she's now the new face for fancy underpants maker Myla. In fact, she does such a good job of extending brand awareness that we haven't been this excited about lingerie since, well, yesterday! (Or at least since Maggie Gyllenhaal got all dolled up in Agent Provocateur. We do have a hard time keeping these thing...

newVideoPlayer("/callgirlfinal_fleshbot.flv", 506, 289,""); Last night was the season finale for the first chapter of "Secret Diary Of A Call Girl", and while we don't know when (or if) the second season will begin we hope Billie Piper keeps finding work in the meantime. Sure, real call girls probably roll their eyes every time "Belle" explains the "secrets" of high-class prostitution, but we find it goofily charming. Besides, it's not like we c...

This whole topless Aussie pop starlet scandal took us totally by surprise, and we've feeling a bit discombobulated ever since those Aussie tabloids starting getting all verklempt about the situation. So we're feeling like we just want to get back to those things we really understand. You know, the simple thing in life ... like dirtpipe milkshakes, ass smoothies, and Sasha Grey getting throatfucked. There's only one of those three in the following...

Have things gotten dull and boring in the bedroom? Are you looking for a way to spice things up? If booking a night at a fancy hotel is a bit out of your budget and having a threeway seems a little too risky, you could always play it cheap and safe and pick up one of those cute little sex books that promise to ramp up the heat in your sex life. You know, like the ones that Cosmopolitan magazine is always putting out. We recently received a sexy p...